Power Ranking Ramblings: Week 12

When Kevin and I started rambling about ESPN’s NFL Power Rankings, we had a very specific idea for what we wanted to do. The problem is I’m not sure that I ever made what we were doing all that clear and lately there’s been some confusion. Allow me to take a moment to illuminate everyone who isn’t quite sure what the purpose of our rankings are.

The rankings that we crank out every week are identical in order to the nonsensical ones that ESPN spews out every week. This is partly because creating power rankings from scratch is a painstakingly lengthy process and Kevin gave me the death glare when I suggested that we come up with our own. However, the main reason we do it that way is because ESPN’s rankings are… well, they are just awful. You will seldom come across something as overly biased and ill-conceived¬†as ESPN’s opinion on who the best teams in the league are. And it’s a lot of fun to call them out on this, so the point of our rankings is to rip on ESPN’s version as much as possible.

Or at least that’s how it started. I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not, but it’s been a fairly abysmal year for the NFL. Bad officiating, bad games and most importantly, bad teams. There are three squads in each conference who have a legitimate shot at winning the Super Bowl, and after that it’s a whole bunch of meh. So while making fun of the Worldwide Leader in Sports and its rampant stupidity is always a good time, we can scarcely allow the league’s overall mediocrity to skid by unscathed.

Just in case you want to verify that we didn’t alter one spot on ESPN’s gleeful rundown of the teams it loves and hates, you can check out their rankings here…

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/18094746/nfl-2016-week-12-power-rankings-dallas-cowboys-seattle-seahawks-new-england-patriots

…and then ours will seem even more entertaining to you. It’s Thanksgiving after all and if we can make you laugh or even force a slight grin, that’s a win for us. Enjoy.

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WWE: Tables, Ladders, Chairs, and… Boy, Did That Suck by Jesse Schaffer

My god, where do I even begin?

The last time I wrote about wrestling, Bray Wyatt had just screwed Dean Ambrose in his match against Seth Rollins at the Hell in a Cell pay-per-view. While many were not thrilled with the finish, I suggested that putting Wyatt and Ambrose together could wind up being best for both of them: Wyatt would get a chance to reemerge as a top heel and Ambrose could continue his ascension as the no. 2 babyface behind John Cena. Despite having just an okay match at Survivor Series and a lukewarm build towards the rematch at TLC, when WWE decided to put these two in the main event (over the much more hyped Cena vs. Rollins Tables Match) I thought that we might finally see my prediction come to fruition.  I was desperately hoping for something special.

Instead, WWE shat all over an otherwise solid TLC match with one of the worst finishes in recent memory. Ambrose wasn’t done in by a vicious and calculating Wyatt, but rather a malfunctioning piece of equipment. When Ambrose went to hit Wyatt with a camera, he forgot to unplug it first, it exploded in his face and Wyatt capitalized for the victory. What was that noise, you ask? It’s the sound of about 3 million wrestling fans farting in unison.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

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