Here at Pegboards it is our goal to entertain you with reviews, rankings and opinions about all of the newest and hippest TV shows out there. On top of that we are also covering the reality show juggernaut Survivor. Yes Survivor is still on and yes I have been a fan since day one and yes I am currently wearing my Survivor One World Manono buff. Don’t judge, it was a gift.

So hello to all my white collar, blue collar, no collar, and shock collar readers out in the internet world. Here I will be writing about Survivor Worlds Apart. It won’t be a moment-by-moment review. Instead I will be taking some of my favorite all time Survivor quotes and using them as categories to discuss the latest episode.

Take a jump to the rest of the article and I promise you I will make you some sandwiches from the ocean.

I can get loud too! WHAT THE F*^@? (AKA the quote(s) of the week)

Originally I was going to attempt to do one quote per week. But this cast is too good. Here are some of my favorites

“As a coconut vendor, I seek truth” Vince, No Collar

“It’s Survivor warfare” Carolyn, White Collar

“Have you ever seen an unhappy person on a jet ski?” Jenn, No Collar

“That’s just weakness leaving the body!” Mike, Blue Collar (after he threw up)

Oh my god these guys are so dumb! (AKA this episodes worst decision)

Okay we all know what this is going to be about. Each tribe had to send two people to make a decision on the behalf of the tribe. The decision was a secret and it ended up being a choice between a big bag of beans for the tribe or a smaller bag of rice and a clue to the hidden immunity idol. Dan and Mike for the Blue Collars chose the big bag of beans as did Jenn and Will for the No Collars. Meanwhile So and Joaquin for the White Collars chose to deceive and went with the small bag.

Now in hindsight that was a bad decision that led to So being voted off first. But I don’t believe that was the worst decision. The worst decision was when So decided to stick with Joaquin. Joaquin wanted to deceive the tribe and So was hesitant. Joaquin pressured So and even told her that she was stuck with him from here on out. So was in a sticky situation so she went with Joaquin’s pressure and told a horrible lie. But let’s back up, why does So not use this against Joaquin? I think an interesting move would have been to told the horrible lie as bad as she did and then to come clean to individuals a few minutes later.

So could’ve explained how she begged Joaquin to take the beans but he didn’t care. She could have even painted him as a sexist pig (which he seems to be) and claimed that he used his judgment as a man to make the decision. Just throw Joaquin under the bus instantly and the target could be off your back. She could have even offered to share the clue with the others to prove her loyalty.

Of course this is all in hindsight and much easier said than done. And I understand So wanted Joaquin as her solid #2. Pairing up with someone early is a good strategy. But their pairing created such a division in the tribe that it was obvious they were in the minority. And as Brad Culpepper knows 2 into 6 means you are out.

I’ve been bamboozled (AKA what surprised me this episode)

Well everything surprised me this episode. But two major points stick out. First I had So as my winner pick and I had Dan as a fun guy who could go far in the game. Yeah I’m the Survivor blogger that sucks.

I thought So would be disgusted by Joaquin and would click with Max, Shirin and Tyler. I also wasn’t aware that it was spoiled that So was the first boot. Spoilers suck okay?

I still think Dan has a shot but he put himself in a hole. How can such a big fan get so frustrated with the shelter? That’s like rule number one. Luckily for Dan, Mike seems to like him. Maybe Mike can turn this around for him.

Who is this jackass? (AKA who has no shot to win and why?)

Joaquin, Nina and Rodney.

If there is such a thing as a winner’s edit then the editors are going to have to work some magic for Joaquin and Rodney. Both already have sexist comments. Both appear to be colossal douchebags. And both of them seem unaware how to play Survivor.

Joaquin is in an especially bad position. His only alliance mate was eliminated. And he also tried to combine two names into one when he voted. His only hope is that the tribe wants to keep the men around to stay strong at challenges. But Carolyn has an idol and is seen as weak. Joaquin doesn’t have a chance.

Rodney and Nina didn’t have much to do this episode. Which is a bad sign. Rodney is already pissing off the female demographic and the only way he lasts is as a goat. Personally I wouldn’t use him as a goat because he is too much of a wild card.

Nina had very little screen time. And while she seems like she could be a player she is also on a tribe that could outcast her. Her tribe is younger, strong and are full of free spirits and flirts. It doesn’t look good for Nina.

Stick to the plan (AKA who is in a good position if they just stick to the plan?)

Most of this blog has focused on the White Collar tribe. That’s because they were the main focus of the episode. With that I think Max is in the best spot if he just sticks to the plan.

Max and Shirin seem to have some superfan secret connection. Plus the tribe wants to keep males for strength. And on top of that he has an idol in the alliance through Carolyn. Being a student (and professor) of the game could be his downfall. He might read the situation too hard and try to shake things up too much. For now Max should just stick to the plan.

This is my island (AKA who is running the show)

As strange as it may seem Tyler is running the show so far. He doesn’t seem to be in an official alliance but when the alliance was scrambling Max stated they needed to check in with, “the big man” to see if he was on board. On top of that Carolyn told only Tyler about her idol. It seems the tribe goes where Tyler goes.

FORGET YOU. GO HOME. GOODBYE (AKA my last words for the fallen Survivor)

Oh So I wanted to like you so bad. I thought you had a badass, vicious, gamebot thing going for you. I guess you were destined to not play this game since you were pulled from San Juan Del Sur at the last second and you were the first boot this season. Oh well. Last season the first boot was a relief because we didn’t have to worry about telling Natalie apart from her twin sister. This season the first boot is a relief because we should have a lot less eye-rolling inducing ‘So’ puns. Silver lining bitches. This cast is so deep and fun that every week it will be hard to say goodbye to the fallen. So just happened to rip off the band-aid. So sorry So.

Kevin W.