Part of the problem with running a blog at the expense of your free time, and not getting paid to do it, is that it’s hard to be timely. Everyone and their mother had done a spoiler discussion for The Force Awakens already, but here we two months later finally getting around to our version. Do we add anything that you haven’t heard before? Maybe not, but we had fun doing it so hopefully you have fun reading it.
I thought it was a bunch of mumbo-jumbo. A magical power holding together good and evil? The Dark Side? The Light? The crazy thing is, it’s true. All of it. The Jedi? They’re real.
There are some things in life that are indescribable. One of the most endearing effects that a movie can have on us is how they make us feel, for that is how we truly measure what they mean to us and how much we enjoy them as an audience. Maybe that sounds a little corny, but being corny is one of the time-honored traditions in Hollywood. The frenzy that surrounds the release of a new Star Wars movie is another one.
As I sit here and at long-last share my opinion on Star Wars: The Force Awakens, it’s important to keep this in mind. I will analyze and critique the film to the best of my ability, but one thing I could never do justice to is describe the overwhelming feeling of joy I had while once more returning to a galaxy far, far away. It’s more than just nostalgia or the emergence of my inner-child. It’s the kind of feeling that takes place when you are experiencing something you know that you’ll remember forever, and so I could never accurately convey to you in words what that’s like. You just have to live it for yourself.
I lived it. I still have the smile on my face to prove it.
This is a big weekend people. The future of Star Wars is at stake. I’m not talking about whether the film will be a box office smash. Why, that already happened in a flash!
Instead, I pose a simple question: can this new entry to a classic franchise resonate with people as thoroughly as the original films did? More importantly, will the new characters make us glad that we get to relive our childhood innocence once more and prevent the film from succumbing into an overhyped nostalgia trip?
The answer? We’ll see.
I’m a pretty even-keel guy. I don’t like hype. I don’t like hyperbole. I don’t like anything too over the top.
Hell, I even get annoyed when audiences constantly applaud a presenter, musician or any type of entertainment during the act they are performing. It’s a weird pet-peeve but I like it when people don’t lose their shit.
Two days ago, I saw a vehicle that would haul that tanker. You want to get out of here? You talk to me.
When I was a kid, I had a Mad Max video game for the NES. The object of the game was to drive around in your car, collect supplies, outlast the enemy cars in an arena and then defeat the boss at the end. Of course, I had to look all of that up because the game wasn’t particularly good and I don’t really remember playing it, but the point is I owned it. And until this week, it was my only experience with anything Mad Max related.
Despite its standing as one of the more innovative film franchises of the early 80’s, I somehow managed to avoid seeing any of the Mad Max movies during my 25 years on this planet. I know, right? I pride myself on being some kind of film buff but I haven’t even seen Mel Gibson wreak havoc in a post-apocalyptic wasteland? That just wasn’t going to cut it. I set out to rectify the situation and wound up picking up The Road Warrior on blu-ray. That’s right, I bought a movie I’ve never seen before just so I could watch it one time and review it for all of you lovely people.
Relax friends, I found it in the bargain bin at Walmart for like eight bucks. How crazy do you think I am?
The city is flying, we’re fighting an army of robots and I have a bow and arrow. None of this makes sense, but I’m going back out there because it’s my job. And I can’t do my job and babysit. It doesn’t matter what you did or who you were… If you step out that door, you are an Avenger.
I want you to take a moment to appreciate how far we’ve come. Three years ago, the mere concept of an Avengers movie was completely preposterous. Six different heroes stuffed together in the same picture with a little over two hours to tell the story? Yeah, right, that will never work.
Flash forward to May 2015 and not only has Marvel proven that it does work, but now shared-universe films are all the rage in Hollywood. DC is fast-tracking its own cinematic universe by throwing Batman and Superman together in a live-action movie for the first time and hoping for the best. Disney believes it can recreate Marvel’s magic with Star Wars and already a new trilogy and numerous spinoffs are in the works. What was once groundbreaking and innovative has become standard operating procedure at every major film studio, and while the novelty of an Avengers movie may not have the shine that it did three years ago, there’s no denying that seeing our heroes band together on the big screen remains an outrageously good time.
So be sure to soak it all in and remember how fortunate we all are to see such a healthy marriage between different mediums. And while Avengers: Age of Ultron may not exceed its own lofty expectations, it wasn’t for a lack of trying. I mean holy cow, they threw everything but the kitchen sink to try and raise that bar again.
With Avengers: Age of Ultron now available in theaters everywhere, Kevin and I thought it would be fun to rank all of the previous films from Marvel Studios and decide what is truly the best of the best. That part was easy. The hard part was going back and actually watching all of these movies again. Do you have any idea what kind of toll that takes on you? Kevin is pretty much an insomniac now and I’ve been sick for over a week. Can’t shake it.
That being said, it was a good time setting all of this up and a reminder of just how far the movies have come. We hope you appreciate it though, because it is extremely doubtful we will ever be doing this again. You know, until Captain America: Civil War comes out next year… just kidding, Kevin. Or am I?
“What are you thinking? How are you feeling? What have we done to each other? What will we do?”
I’m not the biggest fan of the Academy Awards. Sure, I enjoy watching overpaid actors play nice and revel in each other’s success as much as the next schmuck, but it just seems like the movies that should win aren’t often the ones that take home the Oscars. Considering that any discussion about which film is truly “the best” is a subjective matter, you and I could sit here all day and debate how many truly legitimate winners there have been over the years. We would probably disagree and insults would be hurled back and forth, but that’s normal. As Kevin so astutely pointed out in his Survivor Preview a few weeks back, humans judge one another with little to no evidence to support these judgments. It’s what we do. So if you think that I’m a moron when I say that Gone Girl should have been nominated for Best Picture over many of the films that were, including American Sniper, Boyhood and The Grand Budapest Hotel, then I recognize that you are just succumbing to human nature. And I forgive you.
And seeing as I’m putting all of my cards on the table, let me just point out that I thought Birdman was a tremendously directed and well-crafted film. I have no problem whatsoever with it winning Best Picture last week and I was pulling desperately for Michael Keaton to take home that Best Actor award. But more on that later.
Gone Girl is twisted, irresistible and disturbing. It takes great pleasure in roasting the idiocy of the media and the disheveled nature of mainstream murder investigations. I would be cringing during one scene and laughing the next, but no matter what I couldn’t look away. The two and half hour run time flew by. No matter how badly I needed to go to the bathroom or get up for a stretch, I never left my seat. I wanted to absorb every scene and witness every turn of events, and yet, the questions changed every time I thought I had the answers. For this is a David Fincher film, and nothing is ever what it seems. However, the most impressive feat that Gone Girl pulled off was something that previously I believed to be impossible.
It made me feel sorry for all of the married men in the world.
“It’s not their pain you’re afraid of. It’s yours, Charles. And as frightening as it may be, that pain will make you stronger. If you allow yourself to feel it, embrace it, it will make you more powerful than you ever imagined. It’s the greatest gift we have: to bear their pain without breaking. And it’s born from the most human part: hope. Charles, we need you to hope again.”
With the Academy Awards rapidly approaching on the horizon, we thought it made sense to go back and review some of our favorite movies from last year. Of course, this will include a few films that were nominated for best picture, but we all know that the Academy seldom gets everything right. And in the wake of the huge announcement regarding Spider-Man this week, I was reminded of just how true that can be concerning the movies that I appreciate the most. It will never receive any prestigious awards or recognition, but there wasn’t a film in 2014 that resonated with me more thoroughly than X-Men: Days of Future Past.
I vividly remember the day Kevin and I went to go see it. The weather was insane. A severe thunderstorm moved into the area and caused a rare tornado warning in Lakewood, Colorado, complete with intense hail and those frightening tornado alarms that you would hear in a movie like Twister. My family and I took refuge in a nearby Smashburger, which had rather large glass windows up front. Not exactly the best place to protect yourself from a tornado, I know (I never said I was the world’s greatest Eagle Scout, folks). Thankfully, the worst of the storm blew over and we were able to make the showtime that we wanted.
The opening credits kicked in and I immediately recognized a familiar tune: the main theme to X2: X-Men United, well-known as the very best X-Men film, hands down. A huge grin crept across my face and before I knew it, I was being transported via time capsule back to the year 2003, when Bryan Singer was the king of the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the X-Men were the coolest team of superheroes that we ever could have wanted.
You know what? 2003 wasn’t all that shabby. Don’t mind if I kick my feet up and stick around for awhile.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few days, you’ve heard the big news. Spider-Man has officially joined the Marvel Cinematic Universe! This is a monumental turn of events, one that has been rumored for months but seemed too far-fetched for it to ever actually happen. Now that it is ACTUALLY happening, we at Pegboards feel obligated to react to this stunning announcement and try to make sense of what’s really going on. After all, nothing like this has ever been done before and there is no guarantee that it will even work out the way that we hope it will.
But that’s beyond the point. All that matters is that Spider-Man is finally back where he belongs.
Flimsy Film Critics 